my friends

is it just me
needed to mend
the past relationship?

is it just me
who has to mail
and write
and find
all of you guys life?

sometimes
i don't understand
how the world works
is it always one sided?
or one face
at all time?

hmm...
maybe I should understand
that some people
changed over time
need some break from me
or just taking their own sweet time to think
and reply!

ice skating rink in fairfax, virginia
not as bad as skating first time in sunway pyramid
the burned sunway pyramid

aa...nany, ayu, sasha
teachers and guiders
Boy, segan with me

hehehehehe,
i can't easily get along with guys/man
for the first time
it takes time
to build the rapport

anyway, i skated
fell twice
and came out
as healthy as i came in,

but this morning
i had sore throat,
since ayu got her flu and cold
yesterday

i think i got affected by the same virus
and should go to visit CVS
before leaving for white house
formal tour
and smithsonian
and NASA museum
and planet holywood dinner
( plan jer tuh sumer )

p/s
journal is the best way to keep a homepage , because it is addictive!

yehaaa..

alhamdulillah

first day of eid went well
crazy of ketupat,
kuah kacang, rendang, lemang,
semua ada!

not forgetting,
nasi minyak
ayam masak merah,
my favourite

aaa...too many people
azrin pun ader, heee
(lina jgn marah)

and tarmizi, adik aisyah
budak bangi
lega to see familiar faces again
he's in vanderbuilt univ
taking mech e

and, tonite
went to get lina's leather glove
and my own stove pipe
jersey pants, heeee
( i know, i shop too much here ..)

and again, GAP, express, and feline's basement

miss *, heee

shopping after christmas, cheap
shopping all day long
spend as much as i never had

less than what i gain for a week
that is for sure

old navy, new york jeans
gap, claires, rug 21

i have so much to wear when i came back
to minneapolis
where the temperature is like -41 f
and alone and alone

aaa...do i have enough space in my bag when i aboard the flight?
new bag? yeah

new small bag, esprit, to carry telekung around
heheheh

dark purple,
small esprit

haircut
and nany asked about my hair cut ( last summer la )
because she never seen it yet
and ask " gi salon ker utk gunting rambut?"
hehhehe

ader ker, kalo lawa takper,
nie rupa cam ugly ducklings, takper la
gunting rambut kat umah jer la

i had noris cut the back hair, layered
just the way i like it!

and i cut the front hair,
bertingkat2 gaks,
so that when they grow long,'
the became curly! and not straight

in this dry weather,
my curly hair easily became straight

and i dislike that
even when it is short
(more over when it is long! )

so, now waiting for it to grow long again!
just like last winter
( need that to recover from the cold )

ayu
she is twin ( THAT'S WHAT PEOPLE SAY! )
hmm.. really , i dunno
way, different!

she's pretty
she's intelligent
she's adorable

( nak tgk picture ?, i will scan it later , depending on request , :) )

she studies at john hopkins university, biomedial engineering

p/s nany got off from the phone, calling hari raya, morning kat mesia..

yeah yeah yeah

that naughty boy is making me smile again first thing in the morning
have a nice day! huh!

today, over slept again
planning to go to mall area again

where washington monument is
white house is
lincoln memorial is
FBI headquaters is
aaaa..what else? need the tourist flyer to write this

nevermind, i'll be taking pictures and post it here

showered, eat ( women excuses !)
dancing fingers on the keyboard
read emails,

waitint for everyone to get dressed for today's walk

p/s azlina's leather gloves!

have found my lugagge
yea yea yea

dying to have my favourite khakis, silvertab levi's back!

and my wool sweaters, where its warm and cozy though washington is not much cold as minne

miss my bed and favourite bantal at home!

here i am
bored, everybody has fallen assleep except me and ayu

it has been a while since i read sera's , kak zira's and anas's journal
and today, i visit them all
everybody is in raya mode

and i lost my lugagge
and not feel worried AT ALL

i'm lonely
confused
PMS ( maybe )

it has been a year
since the last guy i admired
left my physical, real life ( he is not dead, just away )

and if you are reading this, forget what i've said
i'ts not over yet!
my blues that is,
here i am regretting what i have wish
for my life, and other people's sake

i, have , asked for the most impossiblest thing to happen
but at the same time

i, prayed that the miracle won't happen
it will be too much to ask for
furthermore, i don't think i can take what i wished for,

but i believe i can take the pain that i've been praying for
uwa, uwa, uwa

that is so me,
so really , nature me,
pain is like a drug
bitter but addictive
to me that is

and rite now
how i wish
mankind are created such that
they don't long for this stupid, fool, feeling
just to continue mankind survival

in this earthly,lonely, cold place!

just me
in blues

Journal for traveling day one


We left Minneapolis at 3.07pm instead of 1.41 pm as promised by the ticket given by US airways. Anyway, the problems continue when the connecting flight was canceled and we were transferred on another airlines, united airlines. We managed to get to DC later 2 hours than expected, but the changed of the flight cause us an even more complicated problem : losing our baggage!

Oh, well here I am in Malaysian student department in 18th st and pi st, complaining abouyt my trip. Can ‘t really blame anyone because I saw many more unclaimed luggage yesterday, meaning that there are more people out there in thus holiday season ( mind you Christmas in on Monday )

Last nite was cool, I have not have my longest sleep in a while, and I had my more than 12 hours sleep this morning, that’s the best remedy now, for current problems!

Later!

allrite!!!, finally my finals are over!!!! yea yea yea, back slap on my back for my own succes, geting myself alive trough my second semester here!!.....

oh, well....here comes my vacation!..and zaza and noris had left for malaysia this morning, before i had my final paper, and when i had my sahur for today.

so, after aem exam today, i head for Target, geeting some of my winter things, some baby oils and legings and shirts.

hmm...tomorrow my flight will be at 1.41 pm. shasha, my companion, her landlady is willing to send us to the aiport. but i need to withdraw some cash before heading to the airport. it's my fault yesterday, when i already had some cash after i sold my textbooks ( including that evil edward and penny! ), i saved my cash to my saving accounts at the TCF.

laundry washing, kitchen clean up, packing things, call up few people before i left, and make sure the house is safe to be left and clean is the list of things i'll be doing tonite.

and so, selamat hari raya and hapy holidays, see you next year!

and today, my guestbook still has some/few entries of which i pelik cos you can't access my blog and still reach my guestbook, nv!

went to post office, block and hold all mails during vacation period ( this friday till january 6 )
get sejadah from office, left it there yesterday

starting to send cards for the second round ( x - mas, raya.. etc )
have not open aem book, exam tomorrow , 1.30-4.30 pm
have not call kak lin to arrange moving things before she go home for good

homesick!!!...miss KLCC, miss Sunway pyramid, miss mom, miss dad, miss home, miss food, miss ketupat, isk isk isk

i have no idea why, but it seems that blogger server is making it's problem again!!!

erkk..huduhnyer frame tepi blog nie!, baru perasan, iskk..malu!!!!!!!!

i'll do anything just to escape from anybody yelling at me. or whining or complaining, not that i don't do it frequently to others, but not as much as i get everyday. yelling, screaming, high pitch voice ( more than 25 decible ) really irritate me , more than smoke from smoking people does.

the reason: those more than 25 dec "noise" makes me feel worthless and not worth living.

example of incident: cooking ihe the kitchen. i was asked to cook my specialty, mamak style fried spaghetti. remember the frog and the bear story?, oh well, i hate to listen the frog screaming around if the duck messed up the kitchen. and so, i have my kitchen towel all the time i was cooking, wiping oils here and there, making sure there will be no spilled left when i finished cooking. and one thought struck my mind: " what happen if the kitchen towel catch the fire from the cooking plate?"

and if the firemen came, asking for the reason of burning the kitchen, the duck would have asnwered "i just want to avoid frog screaming at me after i finished cooking..." ( innocently )...

moral of the story: just because small things, that you don't like andother people get the irritation, it can cause a bid deal to both side, you and the people who live around you!

cooked bubur jagung, first time.
haven't miss any puasa and terawih- hope puasa penuh this year
got my first certificate from the university of minnesota for leaderquest program 2001 - i was selected after last wednesday interview!!
called all candidates telling them whether they got the scholarship or they have to try again
watched mad tv

bought two arcrylic socks ( liz clairbone: nothin' here is not branded)
and some personal stuff, did not found any pants
break fast at subway, ate crab meat subs on oregano parmesan bread, yum yum yum
drank cranberry juice

ate corn porridge
dancing fingers on computer keyboard

realized have not studied physic for ecam on monday,
have not read Urheim email about short circuit

have not review past exams questions on physics

saying good nite and good day to all muslimin and muslimat all over the world not forgetting my chrsitian friends as well,

p/s say ed, stay up till 3 am tonite?

allrte, it's over and we have decided that brian abbot will be coming to USM next year in may...huraayyyy for brian and as for the other four candidate, dont; get dissappointed and try again next year!!!

zaza is solat asar now, witing for her here in blegen hall, we are going shopping! despite the 4 oncjes snow last nite and the blizzard coming, we think we better off at the malls before break fast at four thirty....i really need some proper socks other than cotton because cotton absorbed moisture whereas i would want to keep my moisture to myself rather than to the cotton, and i'm gonna need some real thick pants, other than jeans and khakis and slacks,

enough braging about my shopping list, you guys back home get to shop in pasar malam, and i don't, pity me!

allrite, one paper down, two more to go!!!!...malezx: hei, no mc la, rite now is still friday you know, dec 15 2000...8.50 pm

zulfaa is here helping to evalute those applications for tomorrow's interviews....herkk...finished exam at 4.30 pm, rush to zulfaa's office ( he is a masters student yg gradute last week, skang doing his PhD in aerospace engineering, thus he has his own office aka lab for his research ), went to Somalia restaurants' get some fod for break fast, got home and pray, eat and and now waiting for zulfa to finihs reading those 5 long application essays, why i want to study in malaysia....and those essaya are , to me, amazing full of information with quotes and really some good research.

anyway, thanks to sera a lot, the calculus exam goes , i think, better than i exam 3, not really that hard (not that i don't have anything for on my answer sheet).and i feel better when i realized i already khatam"ed" calculus, and stand the same standard as newton, gauss, green, storkes, and who ever names has been into the nobel prize winner...ekekekek

and now, next semester, DE linear algebra is waiting, another level of higher hirarki of the world of academicians!

p/s monday: see urheim for short circuit explanationn, physics ecam on montag, 6.30-9.30 pm
thursday: aem exam...and FREEE!
p/s2: nak gi shopping ke rtak esok? ader sales nei....hmmm???

this morning we had our review session for physic. oh, well, today is not as cols, about 0 f, rite now it is 8 f. but that is still under 0 c...

i'd like to put up all the websites i visit everyday into my menu here in the blog, but i have no idea how...but this is quite a list

sera ( first inspire to make my own blog)
anas
mat jan, usually, what i do, is, open mat jan's page and access everyone's else page from here, like cik daun, idzwan, elliez, zainal etc, etc
zira yg best
kak max
udika's

allrite, you guys promoted my page, now it's my turn!

why is everybody curious of which girl in the photo is me?...well, tell you what, like sera who never shows her photos, like anas, who cut his head from his photos, and like mat jan who followed anas steps, i am going to post my pictures here on my blog, but you have to guess which one am i...

cik jannah dearie, all the girls are cute ( schon! )..and i'll email you later to tell you which one am i..!!

hik, any guess?

if my journal entry for the photo did not show up when you access my blog, klik here

yg berjaya kat bawah tuh, berjaya masukkan image dlm hp nie, since dari arituh try create image asyikk tak keluar, smlm test keluar image, ari nie dah tader ker?

the photo belwo is taken masa gi stc kat mccormick state park last summer, yg ader dlm gambar tuh sumer budak2 purdue university, i'm the only dari univ of minnesota....

and mom, German tuh dah lama berjaya, mmg takyah amik finals dah, siap dpr sehr schon lagik dari cikgu, ekekekekk :)..so dari 4 classes. one A is in hand...

akhirnyer, berjaya juga!..

so, mirror, mirror on the wall, whose the fairest of them all?

today is not as cold as prediected, at least for this morning. i can't write anything insulting this week, i'm fasting and i'm taking exams, may Allah bless me for taking care if my tounge ( ye ker? ).

few controversial things happen this few days. exam tension, loneliness, coldness are the main contributor to this problem. and thus, to avoid more "personal" touch ( applied to non - webmasters life story ) on my page, let us change the daily life to a day in animal farm ( penah baca tak ? )

when all the animals decided that they are going to have schools like human does, they are not so sure of what kind of syllybus they whould have. because in the swimming class, the duck and the fish will surely win all the race and in the jumping class, surely the frog ngan the kangaaroo will win all the races.

and so one day, ugly little duckling was swimming in the pond, where all the students were in swimming class. he was practicing as the race will be on the next 3 days, and she just started swimming yesterday!. and so he was practidcing happily as he approached two other students who were taking a break from the class. they were the bear and the frog.

bear: i hate it when you can swim
frog: hey,i just learned swimming yesterday la..come on la, i practice you know
bear: liar, i never saw you practicing here, in the lake
frog: i did la, it's just that you never see me doing it, does not mean i did not do it.
bear:well, i still think it's unfair
frog: what unfair?swimming?

if only the conversation between people are that way, cam kak zira cakap, when we don't like it, express it, when we don't want to hear it, say stop, and be courteous, for Allah's sake, this is rational life, we are no monkeys in zoo bars, we think...only differently..."dodge different", iklan kete dodge..

and moral of my animal farm: be the ugly duckling, life is so much easier when you are not the center of the attraction!

here i am chasing my TA here and there. the wather is more than cold. and i am wearing 4 layers of clothes. urghhhh.....tomorrow is even worse, the weather is predicted to be FRIGID!!!...whereas to day is cold...(sigh)

'ain who used to be my deskmate in class masa form 5 kat KISAS, send me a poem for my b'day. hey, where have you been all this while? rindu la wei!!! sumer budak klas kiter ( pompuan aa ) hilang begitu sahaja, tinggal ed sorang carik baik all you guys...:)

here's the poem:

Ed,
Dan kitalah pelayar
Mengharung laut harap
Bahtera kedil di dada ombak kehidupan
Di tangan kita kemudi
Terasa payah mengalah arus dunia
Bekal kita
doa dan air mata
Juga secangkir semangat,
tangis dan semangat.

Entah besok
Badaikan mengamuk
dan kita dilambung penentuan
Lantas sabarkah kita
menahan angin taufan
Apakah layar bahtera kan robek..
Apakah kemudi kan patah..
Lantas samudera ini kan jadi kuburan???

Entah bila
mentarikan menjelma di kaki langit...

Ed,
Kitalah pelayar
mengharung laut harap...
terpaksa akur menelan kepahitan...
Namun ketahui,
pahit itulah bakal mengajar
nilai kemanisan..

Selagi ALLAH menghendaki,
Fajarkan masih menyinsing...

Teruskan perjuangan!!!

All the best!

she was the school BM debater while i was the english debater. she is angle of the class, while i was the "menace" of the class. she obeys all school rules , while i broke all school rules. my male classmates like her a lot, while they hate me as much. hahahahah! ( she who laughed last, laughed best! )

that's surely tells ya something about me...

stubborn you are, naughty you are, schon you are, genius you are, happy-go-lucky you are, UNIQUE YOU ARE copy anasnyer, :)

dah later2 in the day baru ader tenaga, aper la, tadik2 tido jer, rasa cam nak pitam. sama cam rasa masa lepas amik triple shot sblm fly. masa tuh, pi klinik yati kat section satu nuh, tgh2 hari jumaat, naik beskal. actuallynyer, klinik tuh dah nak tutup, tapi sbb tu family doktor, dia sanggup la tunggu ed kejap dtg amik triple shot yg required before fly tuh.

as known, ed mmg takut needle and syringe2 nie, udah ler triple dos, rasa sakit dia, tak terkata ( kak max pls la reka cara lagi baik utk bagi shot! )

then, after the shot was given, balik la umah naik beskal yg di beri nama chrys ( mountain bike2 series ). mak tak kasik naik motor, takut accident, bapak plak tak kasik bawak kete sbb dia kater " usaha sendiri utk carik duit and beli kete sendiri! ".

on the way back home, the sun shine sesgt, paham2 la tgh2 hari kat mesia. the sky is blue and the sun was shining too bright and to hot for me. sampai2 umah, my vision become blurr, bila pandang muka mak, nampak dot2 hitam kat muka dia, so rasa semacam gaks, "am i losing my vision?, aper nak jadik ni?" i did not dare to tell my mom sbb takut dia panik, so diam jer. then i went to my room, tell gg ( my little sister ), " along nak tido, along rasa penin aa", so off i went to bed.

when i woke up, my vision is 20-20, yea yea yea!...then i make my own solution, next time, if i suffer any "funny" kind of sickness, off to bed i go!...

so, tha't what i felt today, and that's whay i did, whenver i felt the "funny" sicknesses again!

good morning world!
and hepi besday to myself, the 19th, yea yea yea......

my limb is all weak, due to 13 hours straight of sleep. lepas terawih smlm, amik satu unisom, terus tido, straigh, tanpa makan sahur, so all i ate yesterday was little bit of rice and that's it, off i went to bed....

dah my body is craving for sleep since monday, amik ko satu tidur yg best..and never ask for it again after this, since, this coming friday is my first finale paper for fall 2000, which is calc 3.

then comes physics on monday nite and last but not least, aem on wednesday afternoon. thursday, off i go to washington DC!!! yea yea yea....

german you said?..well, if i managed to score 85% out of the marks before my final, i don't have to take the final and still score and A.
and now , out of 4 points i can make, i only mader 2.5...if by next week, i managed to maintained this, there will be no german final for me!! congratulations for myself!!!

yesterday journal is not yet uploaded from my computer at home.

today's schedule is more packed than i expected yesterday. more places to go, more people to see....sigh, when will this be over? cepat la cuti!!!

so many kad raya in my mailbox, where is my b'day cards? :)

just now, walking back from AEM class ( kat fraser hall ) to my work place, awin, me and zaki walk together, the guys were going to como masjid to catch friday prayer. we were talking about tomorrow's event utk PERSISMA, buka puasa and solat terawih berjemaah, yg tak confirm lagik becos an ustaz from
MSD chicago nak mai plak,

then zaki asked me wether i know how to reserved a room here on campus, i said yes. then he asked" eh, arituh noris carik room, why dia pi tanya org2 lain sedangkan u is her hosmet?" then i answered, " dah dia tak tanya ed".....and he said " egocentric"...hahahahha

so true yet so painful to hear. i am egocentric. rite now, i stop going to 2 student's houses here in minnesota just beacuse little things like that.

one house i stopped coming to is zulfaa's and rafique's. the reason is simple yet strong enough to keep me from going there if i can afford to. the story is like this:

one day, me and jambu derek went to their house, when only one of them was at home. then the person said, " do you guys mind leaving this house as soon as possible?"..after that, the only thing i remember is, " never , ever, step in this house again! "

the other house pulak is the biggest house here. the reason pun more or less like the above, but with a more personal way. the story goes like this :

we were on our way driving to purdue university for midwest games, the driving took us about 12 hours with a lot of stops. since i am the co pilot, it is my job to makesure the pilot don;t go assleep or else we ll would end in the ICU , all the 12 of us..so we were talking about 4 seasons and why it happens, the driver, who was my friend from austin, texas, asked me about it. then i said, it's because the earth is roating excatly on the y axis, but it is tilted a little bit. one of the guys who lived in that big house make a very peculiar remark that i did not wanna hear at that time.." ala..si ed tuh ngarut jer tuh, yea la kan kene layan driver, sbb tu la pilih ed, sbb dia pandai ngarut"..that's it, never ever, visit them them again!

sumer samer jer!

well, more busy days ahead...



testing utk kesekian kalinyer!

little note for Miss Munajat:i nyer journal yg ader msg utk you tuh, dah masuk archives, so, klik la kat archives last week :)

today, is handicapped day. for two reasons:

1. two of my fingers is not functioning well, caused by two papercuts yesterday
2. i skipped 2 classes this morning, in return i got 8 hours of good sleep...( yea yea yea )

luckily, today is not as cold as yesterday, i think today is about 10f, whereas yesterday is about -2 f which is equal to -18.5 c.
and yes, i will never see anything above 0 c for this coming few months. kak har meailed me her address, and alhamdulillah her wishes when she came here last summer were granted, she is expecting a new baby next year!!..and the best part is, when i'm going back next year, i can go and visit her and her new baby!..cam jadik auntie plak, ekekeke

this saturday, i'll be mailing out all the cards to be send home and ther countries including korea and australia, so check your mailbox within this few weeks!

hmm..not much happen today, got physics lab and an invitation for open house at the minnesota international center...
other than that, i slept, woke up for aem lecture at 12.20, then solat zuhur, went to lab, came home with Jambu derek ( aka azarina )
, it is still snowing outside, that's why it's warmer than yesterday..check mailbox ( both reality and electronically, byk giler surat )
iklan and sales for christmas, solat 'asr..break fast with nasik, ayam, tea, sayur and chubby hubby...

then solat maghrib, online kat pc nie ha, then lost the idea for writing my blog today

the end

erkk..not being feminist here, but note left by Subly make me kind of " dogmatic " ( here we go again! )

number of guys here in the U of M is a lot more than girls beacuse of the majoring they offer here, mech e, chem e, aero e..most propably not much girls wanted to come here. and moreover, the picture there does include many other people ( ramai yg malas masuk sesi photography ari tuh )..

end

notes utk Zira

guestbook tuh bukan tak berfungsi, tapi entry kak max yg ader gambar tuh, bertindih ngan image given by the webmaster ( tpt sisi form tuh) so what i suggest you to do is, gi kat preference and choose more than 5 entries per page, and see what happen, if nothing change, then email la mamat neoneo tuh, the webmaster,,,

and blog nie, i'm not so sure, cause i can still update my blog, but i can't open the webpage of this blog, prob maa...

end

allrite, once more, given the oppurtunities, alhamdulillah, break fast in the office for one more time..
and today, i got the chance to pack few things before i left for school..

i grabbed last nite uneaten salami and telur mata kerbau (between two slices of wheat ) and my favourite of all times, bubur nasik telur ( i have not give it any appropriate name yet, cause i just invented it last 3 weeks when i got cold and feverish and had no idea what to eat, and ponteng klas for one week!..ugrhhghghhg..ugly week! and grapefruit juice...:)

i am all fat and big!

well, try to hantar email kat zira, but server @ postmaster tnbnyer email server kater mailbox dia dah penuh...:)

first of all, thanks to anas for the picture and the lesson, i'm gonna try it out today at work with all the boredom untill 7 pm....

now, i am in global study program office where i am waiting for the application form to be photocopied. you see, i am one of the peple who are responsible in giving out scholarship for a study exchange program between USM and my university. and so, every year, 2 students from my uni is chosen to study kat m'sia for a semester and 2 students from m'sia will come here to study for the spring semester. last year, 2 gals came, and this year another 2 gals is coming ( what is happening to all the male students??!! )...one girl doing chemical engineering and aerospace engineering...this uni is in the tope ten schools list for mechanical engineering, aerospace and ranke
the 1 in chemical engineering ( according to US news 1998 )..

this year, for the first time, a real malaysian student is actually involved in choosing the candidates for receiving the scholarship...before this, no one wanted to this, which i kind of thought as very interesting, experience and power ( heeheh, i'm not gila kuasa la, praktis jer :) )....and so this year for the first time jugak la, number of applicant nearly approach 10 applicants ( berkat daya promosi dari kelas ke kelas selama seminngu). i had to go from class to class, annoucing about this program and promoting to them to aplply this scholarship to study abroad. rasa cam masa skolah2 pulak, masuk kelas ke kelas buat annuoncement depan students and teachers, except that they have a lot more questions.

this program not only offer students to go to m'sia for free, they also have aggreeement with other universities from germany, tanzania, iceland and, tak igt satu lagi...anyway, before this we had to be the penalist for the open day for promoting this program. at that time, i;m the youngest penalist for the board,..and this is not the first time on any program i'm the youngest penalist/ represenatative...because most countries are represented by their master's degree students, and here we have only very few master's students who wanted to be known as m'sian :)

and so, tonite i have to review their applications, along with zaza, whom i heret along this work, and read their essays, grade their transcripts....ewah, cam masa MARA kasik scholar pulak dulu...call them to interview and interview them and decide who are the two lucky people who will get the chance to study in USM for free!...they will be surprised that the comitte member is younger than them!..ekekek..let that be the funniest part and something that they will remember before coming to m'sia..the schon madchen ( kene masuk bakul in other language! )...

here i am in kolthoff hall, having my german lesoon for today. we are not done yet, we are in our break. 6 minutes...

let me introduce all my instructors for this semester, fall 2000 ( just in case i forgot them )

blythe innners - german 1001
jon urheim - physics ( electromagnetics )
yohannis ketema - statics and dynamics
donald aronson - calc 3 aka multivariable calc

till then

ahaks, sera wants to know why ed is so courage why ed gives away her address here? that is because she is moving next january 6!.....but all the mails will be fowarded to the new address by the US mail...that's is something here you don't have in m'sia. here is you move away, or you went on a vacation, the US mail will keep all your letters, and forward it to the new address given by you. all you have to do is fill out a from in the post office and show a picture ID, ( that this is you requesting, not fraud ), and they will do what you ask them to do, basically la...

about that photo, here are some funny facts about the photo publish in the utusan:
edisi utara: black and white with names
edisi tgh: colored with names
edisi sabah sarawak: tak sure colored or not, but no names

hehe, so figure this one out, who am i?...

ermm..nie nak test ilmu anas kasik dulu2

eh, the photo in the utusan is black and white la, you can never detect me la, the small2 one ( eh, pecah rahsia plak ), nevermind la , wait for harakah and berita edition, ....ekekekk..colored version.

since the last two journals i read are about raya and kad raya and taking of break from writing journal, i'd like to have few words regarding this too..

cuti from journal writing
well, depending on my acces to the free world aka i-net, i would still like to update my journal everyday even when i'm so far away from this slow computer here at home. i must admit, i am an internet freak, i can't live without internet...
but i do think that malaysian embassy surely has their own internet networking ( mischieveously, like wicked grin from the witch from the west! )....and i can;t live without checking my emails, thus, i will, and will try my best to update my journal everyday...

raya and card raya
if anas can make a wish, for a hari raya card and he is going back for good, whatmore ed who wil be rayaing here, heheh, i can make wish too what?

here is my add,

Nadhra Halig
624 Huron Blvd SE #102
Minneapolis MN 55414
USA

simpler jer, saper nak hantar parcel hadiah b'day pun di alu2kan, ekekek ( melampau tak permintaan ?)..

today for break fast. it's really yummy, yummy food...apple pie ( by noris ) and chicken rice by zaza...i'm the only one not cooking, after the incident of chicken spghetti, i did not dare to cook, at least not this week, let me get over the phobia..

anyway, it about time now, 7 minutes more to go...later :)

rite now, i am online, chatting with aida ( girlfriend shazlan ) and my own best bud azlina.
azlina got some very ( jgn perasan makcik, pls la !)
interesting idea about thinking..:)

^zazu> yeah
^zazu> maybe kot
^zazu> hmm
^zazu> entahlah
^zazu> some ppl
^zazu> likes to think
BlueIceCube> you don't?
BlueIceCube> aper la..
BlueIceCube> ekeke
BlueIceCube> thinking is like breathing what
^zazu> i mean
^zazu> some ppl think heavy stuff
^zazu> you know
^zazu> cam enstein
BlueIceCube> hmm
BlueIceCube> how do you differ
BlueIceCube> heavy and light?
^zazu> light tu mcm benda future
^zazu> mcm apa nak makan
^zazu> heavy tu mcm
^zazu> kenapa things happen the way they are
BlueIceCube> ha..
BlueIceCube> interesting tuh
BlueIceCube> menarik
BlueIceCube> maner u dpt such idea?
^zazu> biasalah i
^zazu> suka buat teori yg irrelevant
BlueIceCube> ekekek
BlueIceCube> tapi ader benarnyer la..
BlueIceCube> nak masukkan dlm log aa

so here it is and partial credit is from Azlinawati, puas hati makcik?..thanks a lot for the sweater, hopefully tuh hadaih b'day i la kan? yg ker 19...erkk..nak mintak benda2 lain lagik buleh tak? like b'da kad, and kfc and .......:)...say hi to everybody

saper nak tgk gambo ed dan budak2 Univ ed, sila baca utusan minggun ahad, dec 2 2000, carik gambar budak2 minnesota, ed adalah minah yg bertudung putih and berbaju kurung biru, what do you think of me ( ala, gambo beso btg lidi jer...:)

i am hypoglyclaemic ( salah eja kot! )..like Jannah, i easily lost all the glucose in my body system. this may due to two things: my high KMA or my high insuline in my body.

my hypoglyclaemia was discovered in 1998, right after SPM, before my medical check up. it was my aunt who works at army hospital in Kinrara ( aunty Marsila ). she brought a small device to test people's blood to see how much level of sugar one have in their blood. this is beacuse one of my uncle has diabetes, so she wants to make sure that it was not an inheritable disease .

and so everyone had their blood prickled at the end of a thin needle and swiped on a small, rectangular, white card which is later pust under the device to get the reading how much sugar one hvae in theri blood. it was a small square, grey box, with columns for digital numbers like in calculator and it measures sugar miligram per ml blood.

and i am afraid of blood and needle and anything that got ot do with it. this is why i did not go to med school. and so, my fingers were cold when she prickled the blood from the tip of my index finger. then she swiped it on the white card, and then inserted it under the small grey device. the digital column give a reading error.

she decided that the machine( small device ) need more blood to get the reading. so she pressed the tip of my index finger for more blood, and the white card was thick with blood, and still after inserting it under the sugar detector, it said there was error.

the third time, she replaced the old white card with a new one. and she prickled my finger at a new spot on my index finger ( ouch, ouch ouch!)
with more blood...( eeeieiieieieieiieieii! )

only then the devide gives a reading : 0.02 ...

and my aunt was surprised, because the normal sugar amount in one's blood is 0.05 ( the safest ), before one is consideres diabetic. and my reading shows that i need more sugar in my blood, hik sounds like i don't eat sugar at all, mind me they come from carbohydrate..

now that explains a few things that i experienced, like "floating feeling", non - real life experience and the feeling that my brain is being "squeezed" a lot of times.

well, that's not a serious or any major illnesses, just reminding myself that i lack sugar and I NEED TO EAT MORE,

jannah, do you have any idea how to overcome this? ( med student, surely you have something, kan? ) heheh..

just broke fast, 6th day..going on 24 days more..and life getting too much, too demanding from me..cepatla final, cepat la cuit!. at least once i got to DC, meeting ayu and the geng, masa tuh release some adrenalin low kot.can't hardly wait!

utk buka ari nie, coffee french roast and kurma 3 bijik. that's it, tak selera la..lepas nie nak solat, tolong zaza masak laksa and semayang lagik and terawih. kak zie called telling thet she could not make it to dar al farouq ari nie, so tak sampai la cita2 nak solat terwaih berjemaah hari nie...

:)..peace!

the last journal was written right after sahur. i had my porridge from last nite and a little scoop of ben and jerry's ! i had my favourite falvor, chubby hubby..( look at the name itself you can guess what's the indegredient )..it has pretzels coated with chocolate with the flavor of peanut butter ( since i go here, i really like peanut butter )...with the swirls of true vanilla and chocolate peanut butter, yum ,yum...that is my favourite flavor...

today, i am supposed to finished my german essay and my aem hw, wish me enough energy to do those!

hmm, semalam as soon as ed sampai umah, terus naik atas bed tido!...tak larat aaaaa.. nak makan pun tak selera, letih sgt. logik la, this week mmg tido pukul 2-3 morning, and then klas for sure mula kul 9 hari2 and end paling awal pun khamis tu, 3.20 pm, sejam sepuluh minit sblm time buka, berkejar masak buka posa....

and then sblm jejak bed tuh, kak zie call, ajak pi solat terawih kat masjid darul farouq, tapi since dah tak larat tuh, mimpi la, pesan kat kak zie suruh call esok sblmd ia gi, pegi ari nei la kira, ( journal ni ganti smlm punya )..

on the way balik umah smlm, dah la windy, i think it was the coldest day of this week la, sbb pakai wool sweater yg selalu takyah pakai glove and berpeluh2 pun, kene pakai glove and still terasa angin mlm, terhuyung - hayang masa balik ,rasa cam nak jatuh jer, maybe sbb kurang glukose sbb mlm smlm tak sahur :P

daya konsentrasi sgt2 la rendah, aper pun takleh pikir lama2, seih betul, sbb dlm klas dua tiga kali duk remind diri sendiri," eh, dlm klas aa, dengar aa aper instructor cakap, jgn la pikir benda lain plak"

pastuh, kul 10, bangun, solat isya', solat terawih, noris pun balik. ed tanya dia, " lapo ker?", dia kater masakla aper2 pun sbb zaza tadik "ketakutan"( ceriat ttg ketakutan ini akan di sambung apa bila ia tida hangat lagi, harap maklum! ), so dia buat scramble egg. the deal is, ed nie musim2 posa and time2 lapo, cerewet sket pilih makanan, tuh la susahnyer...so masak la bubur, simple and sedap!

tapi lepas masak tuh ilang selera lagik skali, so layan noris borak lepas dia solat isya' and terawih, dia baru balik keje tim etuh, dia keje cashier kat recreational center..dulu ed keje jadik custodian kat situh, skang tak lagik la..

skang nei takut plak nak pi timbang berat at rec, lagik2 sejak mula posa ni...ednyer berat mencapai nilai optimum skali jer, masa form 3, last time duk ngan mak, 48 kg..pastuh lepas2 tuh , sampai skang, paling2 pun masa kat ppp 45 kg...la nei lagik la..last time timbang summer ( cuti ari tuh ), 43 kg..skang nie dgn tak makannyer, tader seleranyer, tak tahu la baper..

tuh ari tuh kak har sakat ed, "ha, nei kalau berat tak sampai 45 kg, jgn berangan nak get pregnant aaa" ekekek...skolah lagik aa kak har!...camner aa? mak ed baca nei, sure bising, "aper la anak aku nie " sorry mum, just takder selera aa, pastuh banyak sgt keje sampai tader masa nak makan, ( tuh alasan menyedapkan ati jer..)

masa hawa dtg sini main ski, dia pun kater, " eh, ed makin kurus". masa tuh rasa nak jerit jer, apsal la kurus gt, samapi sumer org sound, sedih woo..camner nak gemuk nie?..ishh..confuse sekejap...

cerita2 sedih smlm ed nak lupaka sekejap, so later2 laa..kiter cerita okay?

masa pegi beli filet utk buka kat office kat moose tower ( medical school for this univ ), org yg jual tuh tanya ed "is that for lunch?". i said la " no, it's for break fast", and he says" it is already noon, it is not morning"

" i'm fasting today"
"that's what i thought, when i saw you wearing veil , taking that filet, i thought you are not fasting today. i'm also fasting today, i'm a muslim too, from morrocco, whre are you from?"
"i'm from malaysia"
"alhamdulillah, happy breaking fast!"

sbb ed beli tuh dlm kul 2 ptg, since pegi anta video kat bio med library, singgan cafe sekejap sblm balik office balik, at least ade makanan nak buka.

saper kater kat mesia jer bulan posa takleh makan kat public?

in less than five minutes, i have to do closing for this library..it is now 4.55 pm and i had just finished my maghrib prayer and buka posa here in teh library ( no food and drinks in the lib for patrons! )

so many things happen today, and yesterday. but first et me thank Allah for giving me strength t continue my life and opening up some people's mind to help me get through..(syahdu rasa, kan lan ? )

t be continueed when i get home

( this is due to my homesicknes in four languages that i known..eheh..practice make perfect!)
meine familie

ich habe vier geschwester( not including me ). zwei junger schwester und zwei junger brudder. mein vater und meine mutter arbeit sebagai kerani im der universitat national auf malazia.

askunu fi bandar baru bangi. i grew up there since i was born till i left my home for boarding school wenn i war 16 jahre alt. meine eltern nicht gibt their children to go to boarding school at 13 jahre alt.

ana uhibbu usrati jiddan. waktu kecil-kecil dahulu, ed baik ngan ayah dari ngan mak sbb mak ed ader prob kesihatan sket, so i rarely see her when i was young. ed adalah anak tunggal untuk usrati for 6 years.

antara memori paling best masa kecik2 dulu was time2 posa nie la. abi yakra'u al-furqan bakda kharaja min surau al ehsan ( the nearest surau to my house, 5 minutes walking distance). hua ist pious to me. masa dulu, dia selalu jadik muazzin kat surau, so me and my mom will be waiting at home, before waktu semayang, nak dengar saper yg azan. i guess sejuk hati seorang isteri dengar husband dia azan kat surau :)
kan mummy kan?

wa zeit morgen ( sahur ), ich nicht gern stehe im morgen. ummi will suap me in my sleep on the dining tisch :P neat huh?
sekarang kene bangun sendiri, masak sendiri and makan sendiri2, sedih!

pastuh, time buka, ummi kuche gutten esen. never the dish for today is the same as yesterday, yum yum yum. al an, ich habe kuhen vof schule, und the essen ist simple und nich spesel as ummi always did.

meine mutti gern anak2 dia ta'alim more than one language. thus, wenn we were young, we were sent to tahfiz and study quran, tafsir, hafazan, arabic, and fikh and hadis. ich tak suka pegi skolah agama, bosan!

dah sekarang baru sedar, yg aper mak ayah kater tuh selalu betul, skang baru rasa berfaedah la pegi skolah agama, amik bahasa2 lain, dan banyak
lagi la benda2 yg derang suruh. dulu masa kene suruh, selalu malas nak ikut, takpun, ponteng klas..eekke:) naughty me:P

ha, man hua komen uber meine journal?..unless your're quadrelingual like me, ekekekkek...( no, i'm not over it yet! )
this is one of the reason i'm a debater, i'm really defensive und protective und schon madchen!

the day started unluckily. i miss the east bank circulator on my way to school ( i said it was unlucky because i got groupd quiz today! ).and i was 5 minutes late for my next exam which is calculus 3 on the west bank..

you must be wondering how the campus like. well, the twin cities name itself refer to the 2 main campus, one in st paul and one in minneapolis. and i am in minneapolis.

minneapolis campus is divided by the missisipi river, so they are named after which side of the river they are in, west bank or the east bank. most of the technology and science classes are in the east bank, however, the scheduling office decided that students need to walk around the school, so they tried to make all the recitation section from the math department to take place at the west bank. and that is why ich habe to run from places to places this morning.

and today is registration day, and alhamdulillah, i got the classes i wanted except for one: reading short stories, which is the graduation requirement class. i am not, repeat, not a humanities/art/bussines major, thus i am not good with my words and expression, i can give figures and numbers to dictate my emotion, and now i am practicing my communication skills through writing.

( this got something to do with the notes in the guestbook writen by "me")

i am not an english major
nor i am an arts major
nor my SPM english is A1
nor that i feel my english is good

just that so you know, that if you don't like reading my english,

IT'S F***, DAMN, A*****E( cukup letters tak?, spellkan please) , NON OF MY BUSSINESS!
(keep it to yourself, no one need to listen to you here, because this is not, repeat, not YOUR PAGE!, please!)
hahahhahahahahaahhahahahahhhahahahhahaahhahahahahhahahahahahahhaahahahahhahaha

by the powerful and dogmatic and cute and genius and choleric webmaster

p/s camla bm yg di gunakan is real BM, :P

i lost my earphones tonite, and zaza lost her calculator..here in this house ( aprtment actually), so was it misplaced or stolen?..we don't have the answers yet.

last nite while i was updating my journal, i was using it on y cd player, listening to ABBA. i left it here near the computer cart. after that i went to bed, but i can;t remember whre did i left my cd player and my earphones before i went to bed.

and this is not the first time we lost electronic gadget in the house. the first thing we lost was our tv remote control. luckily after we bought a vcr, we can program the tv using the vcr remote..

zaza thinks that all the missing stuff went to our garbage bag, near the kitchen counter. i have a feelign that once we started to move and pack our stuff around the house before moving into the univ apartment, all the missing things will be found..what da ya think?

just woke from sleep after iftar, i never knew i was that tired everyday. i simply dozed off once i put my head on the pillow, hei, those freaky doctors ( sorry max!) are damn right, we get tired, i never believe that it is true...

imagine all those days i got back from school at 7 pm the least or 6 the most, how tired my body is, and today i got back from the school the earliest, breaking fast 30 min after got back from school and i can dozed off as soon as my heah hit the pillow..wow, imagine if dozed off on those hectic nites!

i just realized that i need some rest, but i have no time..one group quiz, oen calc exam and one aufsatz ( essay) german, i don;t think i derserve a rest, at least not today and tomorrow!

friday, another exam is on the waiting, and work till 5 pm, where is rest?..alhamdulillah my body is not aware that it nees ome rest, thank god that my spirit ( semangta la ) is stronger than my sleep deprivation and rest!

weekend you said? impossible, i got another exam on monday and that aufsatz is due that monday, it is worth 5 points from final grade, amazing!

and if got more than 85 points before final, i don;t have to take the final ( for german), and as far as i am concerned, that would help a lot as i can concentrate on the other three paper and stil get an A for 4 credits out of 16 credits.

alamak, betul kate zira, ednyer template dah membeso, ke kanan dan ke kiri, or maybe sbb ed pakai browser nestcape, sbb last nite masa ed edit template and vide guna ie, takder ler sebeso nih,

camner aaa?

and i have deleted yesterday blog regarding puppy love. lucky zira she managed to read that. i think the counter hit 8 yesterday, so along zira there must be few other people who managed to read that..

all of sudden i felt segan plus ntah aper2 when i talked about my feelings over the blog. something hits me saying that this is lame, too lame ot be poster over the web :P

todai is the third day of Ramadhan, still fasting and still terawihing ( erkkk..sounds werid huh? )

and i have one more lecture and one lab before the schedule for today is over.
and today is my turn cooking break fast dinner. any suggestion what i should prepare?

( mesto korang pelik apsal tiba2 juornal ni jadik bahasa melayu, sbb ader permintaan and one more thing, bulan puasa nie, dia berazam utk di melayukan )

rite now, it is snowing heavily outside, seronok tgk snow flakes beso2 tuh dgn pelbagai bentuk and pelbagai size. i think you guys sure tahu the fact that snow flakes tak penah ader yg same shapes or figure, subhanallah kan, punya ya banyak flakes tuh, tak penah di jumpai yg identical yet..

and skang nie keje, and buka posa kat tpt keje, so sat tadik gi McD, beli filet and hot tea utk buka lagik 20 minutes from now..( 4.34 pm )

ader satu citer pasal tpt keje ed nie: everyday, ader sorang homeless guy nie akan dtg library nie and tgk video or dgr record..and video2 yg dia watch tuh, sumer ttg org2 famous yg ed tak kenal pun, tapi knowledge pakcik nie ( homeless guy nie akan di panggil pakcik dlm perenggan2 seterusnyer )..sgt la hebat. kalau skali dia bertanya kat ed, byk ed takleh jawab sbb ed tak kenal org2 yg glamer2 dlm history writing or music or world history himself..segan!

kalau dia pinjam video, dia takder ID Univ, so dia guna kad yg diberi oleh bandaraya minneapolis yg declare dia nie resident satu park kat downtown, :(..sedih kan?
and waktu ed gi science and engineering lib arituh, nampak dia guna komputer, carik buku..dlm hati ed terpikir, apsal dia nie, homeless, baju buruk2, and smelly, buleh ader knowledge yg kiter yg ader rumah dan berbaju bersih, malu la!

and tadi dia tanya ed pasal islam, pasal muslims facing east, i said it's not east, cause if a muslim is in north pole, he or she would be facing south!..dia punn gelak..and so cerita pasal kiblat..dia kater dia tgk movie lon of the desert and read some stuff about islam..and will be asking more info about it to me..:)

aper2 la..skali baru ed terpikir, apsal kiter kene mengadap kiblat aa? apsal kiblat tu sginificant, selain dari lambang unity umat islam satu dunia? naper mekah di pilih sebagai tanah suci and not other places...so it's my mission nak pi carik jawapan sblm org2 bukan islam tanya....ader sesaper nak tolong?

akhirnyer, berjaya jugak paham chapter 15.2 and 15.3...line integral and conservative force + potential..akhirnyer setelah 2 hari dgb 2 buku teks, satu solution manual paham gak ed ngan multivariable calculus nie, ishh!

nak komen sket, buku edward penny tuh, saper penah guna, buku teks rasmi u of m, tapi, tak best langung, best lagik teks calculus anton yg guna kat ppp tuh...kat sini, asyik refer anton tuh la,,cuma tak laratnyer, anton tuh berat dia 4 kilo ( ader someone penah test beart dia )...yg si edward tuh separuh berat kot...

nak exam nie, posa lagik second day. esok keje and nak pi beli tiket flight gi DC sbb raya sana tahun nie. bersama2 ed nanti Shasha, girl from Russia yg baik ngan ed kat sini, Ayu, budak atu2 satu2nyer yg gi John Hopkins U kat Baltimore, very talented girl, lawa plak tuh, and both my ex roomate yg kat ppp dulu ( blok 12 siswa, bilik 412)..aida and nany yg skang study kat wisconsin madison U

since ari tuh last minit baru decide nak balik mesia, tiket flight sumer dah abis dah...so sedih la, anyway, dulu2 janji ngan ayu nak jumpa dia once dah sampai US, sbb dia dtg US nei lewat sket sbb JHU tak terima student time spring, so dia dtg sini lewat satu sem dari kiterang. tapi takper la, dia dah duk sini since kecik sampai form 3 baru balik mesia. amik pmr, masuk mrsm pc, masuk ppp, dah balik semula dia ker US nie...

tapi, sejak Azizi merajuk ngan ed, ed igt plan tuh dah tak jadik dah..sbb dulu zizi baik ngan ed..pastuh biler dia mention sbb dia kawan ngan ed, ed terus takleh terima...tak suka org simpan2 perasaan nie, segan!

aper la sgt nie org nak minat, tak paham la..kawan2 dah la...

anyway i'm still too young :)
my 19th birthday is coming in 11 days ...hik, dah tua dah..

mak selalu citer pasal my birth, i like kot the story..because out of her 5 times pregnancy, i am the only yg survive...and 6 years after that baru dpt adik, and adik and adik and adik lagik ...so skang ader 5 siblings aa...hmm..my mom selalu kater,
"kalau along rasa cam nak give up something, cuba pikir pasal mak masa mak ilang anak2 mak, mak tak give up pun kan?"

hik, mmg betul pun...kan?

well, hari nie buka nasik somalia ( cam rasa naik baryani la ), lebih2 dari budak2 iowa and wisconsin dtg hari tuh..and masak sket2 lauk2 lain..since kak zie ( isteri abg ghazali, architect yg convert islam 10 years ago, baru kain 2 years, penah keje kat mesia ), ader sini sbb abg ghazali gi MA, dia la masak :)

so, lepas buka, gi klas German till kul 8.50, balik, solat isya' and terawih, si Shasha, budak RUssia tu telepon..mas tuh tgk rakaat 6..so pi la layan..sbb dah lama giler dia tak return my call, risau la kalau2 dia sakit ker aper ker, sbb kiterang close aa..dia nak ikut ed gi raya kat DC tahun nie, nak tgk camner muslims raya katernyer..

kawan dia si Laila yg selalu bawak ed pegi beli ayam tuh, baru convert 2 months dah...dia kahwin ngan pakistani, si shasha nie selalu teman si laila gi islamic center..ntah, kalau baik kang, ader rezeki, tambah la kiter ngan sedara baru!

alhamdulillah, today is my first fasting day...and we had our sahur when malaysians are breaking their fast :) interesting huh?

well, last nite after i got back from work, i met my senior who is going back for good this coming winter. she is graduating and did not plan to go for grad school here. we talked on how people changed when they got here to the state...like forgetting the basic things as Eastern people and began to act like Westerners with Malay attitude..

and i have been here only for 11 months now ( how time flies when you are having fun !)

and then i got back, rest from the coldness, not really cold, i think about 32 F, which is 0 c and is warm enough, i can survive without my gloves!...then clean up and semayang terawih,

yup, i managed to solat terawih by myself. i remember when i got here last spring, the same thign happen, because all the other girls are having their raya on the day i was fasting, same goes this year...:)

one of my roomate promise me that after her raya days are overm she will be praying terawih wth me :)

i wanted to go to masjid or surau, but it seems none is nearby and it's damn cold outside and we dont; have cars ( yet! ). out of 40 malaysian students here, only one guy had a car, the rest of us depend on other busses and our own legs to get around.

and it's the way we lived around campus now that make the saperation distance big. we girls live to the south east campus, whereas the guys live northwest of campus ( salah ker betul nie, saper tahu? )..nearby the guys house, there are a lot of masjid around, where as where the girls live, there are a lot og highway around!...

PERSISMA tak buat meeting lagik, since pyan got back from leadership conference kat dc by m'sian embassy. so we have not yet laid any plans for terawih and breakfasting together on weekends. though skang nie hard time, 4 more weeks to go before final, so many exams and so many assignements...

wish me the strength to keep up the terawih!

allrite, finally ISNA ( islamic society of north america ) annouce fasting date, which is tomorrow, November 27 2000. and so, tonite we will having sahur and break fast at 4.30 sometimes tomorrow.

so how's ramadhan preparation coming up?
classes, exams, morever, ader yg kene breakfast dlm klas, hahaha..that happen to me last time masa posa bulan rejab and syaaban..all i had was a bottle of coke, and chewing gum..hehe..first time in history to breakfast in such manner, sedih!

well,..syukur that maghrib is around 4.30, since i'n the kind yg study untill 8 pm, so in between tuh, buleh la berterawih...niat baik ni, since last ramadhan i missed the last 3 days, i think due to jet lag and tak used to masa in US yet...baru sampai :)

so, this coming year, tak nak miss lagik since in 1996,1997,1998 tak miss terawih unless uzur syar'ie..paham2 la :P

but, tak bestnyer, semayang sorang2..hmm..camner aa?..since school days, it's kind of hard to get to masjid or get toghether with friends with different schedule to pray jemaah..sad la really,

what da ya guys think?

today is the last day for me to finish all the assignment before school start tomorrow. and i got german essay, lab report for physic, preparation for 2 exams and a group quiz..

and i got to work till 7 today

waiting for annoucement for fasting tomorrow :)

here i am today, foe the first time, learning how to use the univeristy library. the main libarary for IT students is temporarily closed, thus we have to learn to share with other colleges main lib.

my house is about 3 blocks from the medical lib ( where i am now ), it is big and has only one entrance from the front. and it has three floors. as a typical medical lib, it is full of journal and books and shelves.

the thing that i just realized today is, this journal need some spelling and grammatical check!...

finally i'm using my gramma not for my class, but just for fun!

my legs are all tired, i just got back from thanksgiving shopping, huh, there were so many many people today out there. it;s like they have been waiting all year long just to wait for this day to spend all their money on clothing, electrical appliances and anything they can find on any mall. anthing at all. at best buy ( where all electrical appliances are the cheapest), the parking space was already full when we got there at around 7.15 am. all the RAM were sold out and printers are as cheap as 39.99. backstreet boys lastest album : black and blue were sold out too and there was only one mp3 player left on the shelve at 8.30 am...

at GAP you can find trousers as cheap as $ 7 and wool sweaters at nordstrom at the price of $8..

i guess that's why people are mad about thanksgivign sale, unfortunately ( fortunate for my savings ), i don;t have much mood for shopping today, i bought things that are only less then $ 10...i spent $ 40, rounded up on two trousers and 2 wool sweaters...

but abercrombie and fitch did not have much sale...

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well, time gi shopping tadik, kitaorg stop utk makan kat food court mall of america.
sblm tu terjumpa zaza ngan aza ngan izham..so kiterang pun decide nak lunhc skali.

well, since ari nei thanksgiving sale, so ramai sgt org kat food court tuh..susah sgt nak carik seat for 6.
me, hawa, zakiral, wira ( couple ) and faiz satu kete, aza, zaza and izham skali. derang gi naik bas pagik tadik

the purdue girls are hawa and zakiral or known as Ja, plus faiz and their senior...( the guy yg sangkut with my roomate
and end up staying with me the second nite they were here! and i wnd up writing hating journal that nite )

and so the makan story goes, we went to saperate places to find our own difference kind of food..

tanpa disangka-sangka, most of them end up eating chicken pepper!..and rice..
i was damn surprised!..igtkan sumer tak makan ayam katok( ayam yg selain yg di beli dari kedai ayam halal )
..haha, i was wrong..

anyway, i am still confused over this matter..halal ker tak ayam kat US nie, ader org yg ardue, member board of USRDA and FDA
( jabatan pemakanan USA ), consists of2 muslims yg pastikan sumer slaughtered animals are made that all the blood shed out
just like zabihah ( halal slaughtered ) animals...

so, mereka2 nie setuju la yg ayam2 over supermarket and yg di luluskan USRDA and FDA nei halal, and US nie
really strict about food, so sumer restaurant kene guna only bend2 yg di luluskan by them..

and so, some of us end up eating at McD chicken burger and eating KFC..

i'm still confused though sbb arguement ni between org kater la, fatwa2 valid from different imam at different mukim

and my dad said it is haram, thus as a member of my family, kiter kene dgr cakap ayah as dianyer "fatwa" jer valid dlm family,

( susah jadik laki nie, i mean jadik ketua keluarga, if dia buat judgement salah, and all family dia end up buat aper yg dia suruh, byk dOsa dia!)

he said avoid la, selagik possible although i admit, i once eat it at one of my friend's relative house kat ohio sbb i thought he ate halal meat only,
...:(

and ed takleh judge derang salah, makan ayam tak halal nor can i say i am right sbb tader hal nak bagik hukum over this matter
since this is not what i'm specializing in..

any opinion?

after i got back from thanksgiving brunch this morning, nobody was at home. i remember zaza saying she want to go shopping with aza, but suddenly i remember the conversation i had with my labmate, " not many shops are open on thanksgiving, but K mart is there for you 365 days a year! "..and the purdue girls are going skiing today, i think.

or maybe they are running away from the mad lady :P...sedar diri sekejep..peace!

then i get onto the computer, reply all the mails that had been sitting there for the last few weeks to be replied. then geton going with my reorganizing thing ( my notes, my table )..and then noris called, asking what's the plan for tomorrow, and i said i knew nothing, tried my best to keep the voice low and steady..

nevermind, while jotting down my hw's, i called izham, asking for AEM class info, and then i tried 2 question regarding momentum and feel kind of lazy,

i pick a book given by my host this morning, it's about king arthur and the kingdom from the point of view of the witch..morgaine..
the good witch from the isle of avalon...i love reading fairy tales, castle and kingdoms, siap ader grimmss book of fairy tales collection lagik

after that, the phone rang again, awin was on the phone, he's bores, so we talked for and hour...then we hang up and here i am in front of the computer..bored and lazy feeling like garfield the cat...big and fat ..meowwwww!

allrite, finally, i think. i'm over it, i hope, which will be tested later in the day, huwaa, ed can you please learn to be patient for once now?

the temperature now is 28 F
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tetiba rasa lonely struck lagi, kali selepas ader member kat wisc citer pasal dia ngan balak dia ader prob.
well, seingat ed dulu, tuh la antara org yg di expect end up with one another, i guess not..

the way she explained it as if she doesn't care, but i know deep inside it hurts ( never experienced such prob)
oh well, this is another incident that make me feel i shouldn't give my commitment to anyone, not just yet..

suddenly rasa nak talk to someone, tapi saper? nak call mak, derang keje skang, nak call lina, ed tak sure dia ader ker dah gi wisc
plannyer sume org nak gi shopping esok sbb shopping time thanksgiving nie la byk sale, t shirt banana republic, dpt la usd 6.99, thats already darn cheap!
that's what Haenn, my labmate said, but the mall would be as pack as it can be la,..as everybody tried to get the best price..

k mart pun give away teddy bear and alarm clock for the first 700 customers esok, one day jewelleer kasik 50% kurang dari 60% price jewellery..
and bukak kul 6 pagik till late nite, just for thanksgiving sale..

so, tomorrow ed akan ikut geng dari purdue pegi shopping kat mall yg 1/4 mile length,
and buleh beli abercrombi and fitch!

haha..

guten morgen!
it's 7.53 am, and i am going to get ready for my brunch this morning,
good news!, i am feeling better today, which i kind of hope will last for at least today, or i will have to runaway again :) herkk..maybe not this time, we'll see :)

my brain is screaming fo glucose now, i can understand why :)
i had not had anything into my stomach for the last 7 hours of waking up, excluding sleeping time :)
aha...i am revenging against something and i am now trying my best not to eat and not to go home as late as i can. i am angry, i was or i am? i'm confused myself! or am i confusing myself?

i was so mad last night being left with somebody i only known for 2 days, along in my own house. where as everybpdy had the joy of escaping the responsibility as a host ( or at least a people living in the house, whichever is more appropriate )...moreover, he is a man! kind of hoping he is girl huh? WRONG!

i wrote a long pages containg my anger last nite and i don't care what anyone might say, because i amd the webmaster for his page, i have the power to mastermind this page!

gee.. woulnd't it drive you nuts, if you have to take someone else's responsibility and abandoning your own, till like 3 am? and you have physic lecture that morning at 9, and GOOD NEWS that tomorrow is Thansgiving holiday and this will be the final lecture before the exam next week!!! isn;t that amazing?????

and i really don;t feel like talking this prob to anyone cause my heart is still, i repeat , is still boiling over this matter and i don't think that i would be able to overcome this "feeling" untill i had my own time doing to my own thing, leaving everybody else with my responsiblity, this time let them feel what i have felt all nite long, from the time i got from work last nite ( around 7.30 untill 3 am ) DAMN!!!!

the list of things that i had lost within that 8 hours of time

1. the time to study my math
2.the time to study my physic ( my beloved, dearest subject! )
3. the time to ring up my host who will be picking me up tomorrow morning for thanksgiving brunch ( we will be having veggie's stuff, what da ya expect? )
4.the time to chat with lina ( she was on the net lastnite)
5. the time to sleep ( i have known my body fo the last 18 years ( or at least when i started to know it, i was 15 )..i need more than 6 hours to get a real fresh, good , handsome looking look in the morning due to my sleep!
6.the time to reorganize my notes and clean up my desk and reply some mails!

i will take as much time as possible to run away from coming home and eating meals, so that when i got back, i'll cook a nice spaghetti meal ( angel hair kin ) and i can eat them as long as i can, so that i can avoid talking thus avoiding me from saying bad things people,

huh!

heheh..here i am stuck with my roomate's fan..haha..should i know this better, that i left..

hehe...too late :)
nevermind...this is so me..aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

huwaaa..............try bukak my own guestbook, takleh... nak nangis la nie!, eiiiii,hmmmmmmm..baca journal2 org lain. **tetiba rasa lonely :(................hmm....mmmmmmmmmm.....sedih!...nak balik kat mak skang jugak!..jeles la..ntah..bercampur aduk feeling skang, dah la tgh2 keje nie, duk sorang2..tetiba angin jiwang plak lalu, huwaaaa,.....sedih!..nak nangis kang, pelik plak patron ( gelaran utk pengguna library ) yg ader kat sini...hmm..apsal rasa camnie?..dah ler ed jenis type yg tak suka citer kat org, suka keep happy jer, biar sumer org rasa kiter happy w/pun kiter tak happy, in the end, kiter jer yg paham aper rasa jadik sedih..jgn bagik org lain rasa sbb ras sedih tuh tak best..

once my ex classmate yg just tgk me from far make a comment: ed dia periang orgnyer, tapi dia frank and kalau dia marah, main hambur jer..hahah so true, senang marah, tapi senang cool down, malah senang forget..erkk..including people's name :)

sedih lagik nie, lagik2 biler si mazeretti mention pasal raya ( ed selalu hang out on irc and OP for #restu and #atu2, carik la blueicecube kalau ader )..camner nie?

i tried to be tough, or at least to look like one tough girl..i want to be happy, or at least look like one, i hate crying in crowd, though i like crying alone, i want to be baik ( aper definisi baik, anyone? )..tapi cam not my standard jer...maybe not now..maybe sometimes, somewhere along the way, i'll be what i want!

today is sunny day and sunglasses day for me. here in minnesota, students always keep their sunglasses in their backpack all the time. because here we use it twice a year, summer and winter...here the winter is sunny and too bright, the white snow reflects the sunshine causing the extra whitening surrounding. making the fair me ( perasan jap! )..became more and more fair!

this journal will respond to sera question about my job

students in united states is used to working and studying at the same time. when i fisrt get here, i was surprised too, how can one managed between working and studying?. and i end up being one of them.
here at the u, whereever you go to, any offices, any department, any place, you will see student being the cashier, the janitor, the clerk, the reception desk, the waitress, the gym instructor, the lifeguard, the security guard evenn..are all made up from students here at the u itself.

so here i am now, working as the student library assistant, here at the learning resources center at the U, where our collection consistsof videos and audio cassettes for learning usage. but ader gak movie cam my best friend wedding and bwn hurrr ( my vater favourite movie ! )

basically, the skill u have to work here at the U is, computer, mac or ibm, and some internal system like me, i have to learn the U library circulation/ catalog system, commincation skill, answering phone and doing general jobs ( but no making coffee and lobbying the boss! )...coffee are made at coffee maker..thanks you!

we are paid every two weeks, and every two weeks our check will arrive at the office or it can also be deposited directly to our bank account. and for international students like me, who are holding f-1 or j-1 visa, we can only work 20 hours per week. so now i am currently working 9.5 hours a week with 16 load of academic load. not bad la...still cam survive

wages here are high, i am paid $8 every hour, depending on the U, but U of M ( the school i am attending ) pays quite high compared to my other friends' school. that means i am paid RM32 per hour almost ( and all i do at work is updating my journal and chat and do school work! )....it is a good place to start saving.

i think that's it

aaa.....today hawa ( my schoolmate since primary school ) is here from purdue University, she got here this morning and going skiing this friday. we had been friends since standard 4 and get saperated when she went to MRSM Jasin and i went to KISAS instead, i got MRSM Jasin, but chose not to go, for distance reason!

here at the state, me, hawa, suria and zaid, used to be in one school in bangi. and again, we met here for our college...there is about 10 bangians that i know studying here at the states!..

dunno why but Bandar Baru Bangians seem to be everywhere. in ireland, i got 2 schoolmate studying medicine. we used to be in the same class while we was in form three...

i heard bangians are growing everywhere!..good, my mom would be glad to know some of her freinds is watching me, hehehehhehe

alhamdulillah, today is full of energy day, and i did not fell assleep in any class today ( baru dua jer pun )...anyway, last nite i couldn't sleep, and i spendt my nite chatting with fara ( student in univ of urbana champaign , illinois )...

we talked about few personal things. i really like this girl, even though we just met once, masa dia dtg minne lawat budak2 laki scholar TNB kat sini...they all just drop by for one nite and off they went to park yg ader carved kepala2 president US tuh, alamak., lupa plak nama dia...( dah igt dah, Mount Rushmore! ) kat south dakota...

she is really nice. anyway, she was associated ( somehow) with our male companion here, pyan :)...and so he story goes..that's it for tis morning, later!

today is sunday, and today is lazy day. chris ( my supervisor at work ) is coming to pick me up at 2 pm for shopping!...she is worried that i might not survived this winter with my decent, wool, blazer. she made me bought a new thermal underwear and today she will make me buy a new better, warmer coat.

erkk.. i woke up late today, as last nite we when to buy our groceries at Cub foods with abg ghazali and wife dia zie. after that we wenet to one of the somalian restaurant and has our dinner there. abg ghazali is the converted american man who worked at m'sia in eth last 10 yeras. now he had came back here for better living as the economic downturn. he is now an architect for wal-mart. heheh, klau jln2 ngan dia, sure bercerita pasal archietecture nyer topik...but he is an alim man ....:)

erkk..ader sesaper buleh ajar on hwo to put a picture ( photo ) in this blog?

allrite. american friday nite....what did i do?..i was about going to bed when shazlan gave me a call......and we talk, as usual, more than 3 hours :)...i cried for the second time in while talking to him..he panicked ..

oh, well, we were talking about me and my jew companion, war in palestine and girls and tudung, music in Islam and real life muslim lifestyle...and suddenly he raised his voice :(..i was upset.because i felt he was angry with me..and i know that lan is not the type that marah easily ...

and so me with my sedih thing and him with his blurred somewhere ...oh well. that's my best bud..and then this morning..( i slpet about 4.30 last nite talking to lan since 11.00 pm with some break from 12-1 )...azlina called, we talked for about 2 hours and she had to go and get her lunch in the cafeteria before it closed ...

my best friends

when people say that friends are little marbles that you carry always in your life, i felt as if i found mine. my two marbles are the one that i found during on of the best year of my life. i did not really recognize when i started to carry those two marbles, suddenly all i know, is that they are there when ever i need them ....

Azlinawati Munajat

my best girlfriend since last year, exact date i'm not so sure. sedar2 lepas tuh we hang out together, everyda niet at 11, lepak dpena pondok pak guard study calculus sama2, and then after midnite, pekene neslo ais ( yum yum ) kat gerai belakang kolej siswa PPP/ITM...and then chat2 untill 2 morning....on friday afternoon afterclass, we took the commuter and lepak at Sunway Pyramid and then go back to her house in kelana jaya, sometimes, split off kat commuter and went home..untill now, we keep calling each other every week, ikut turn la...and so we together build the singles club :) this year , we met 4 times, chicago the lastest, mccormick state park utk program malaysian islamic society of north america, midwest games in purdue and when she came here for the fisrt time during our spring break :)...that the first time i saw her after 4 months we came here to the state...
she used to be the nerd in her school ( MRSM PC )...heheh...but she is really different now. she's cute and nice...a very good listener and best bullied too!

Shazlan Anwar

together we do community services as ATUSA ( AMerican Top Universities Program Student Association ), for a project that cost us 3 months time with a local primary school ....and we discovered that we live closeby, learn about our family and his girlfriend, became the most two legend friends who are predicted to be the best couple og the year if we change from friends to extra friends :) forget it guys!!!...we fight all the time, and we call each other once a week too...but it has been a year since i last saw him ...next year, me and azlina planed to go to his place ( ader disneyland and ala... yg ader history hollowood)..visit Mickey Mouse and him....after we got back from london to visit lina's uncle :)

one thing about lan : he always forgot i am a girl and i am a teenager, he alwaya see me as a kiddo!

allrite, these are the two most trusted people after my parents to my life..

welcome to my world...

last weekend little arguemrnt still ran in my mind, one reason why i got headache and fever!

my german and spain companion was asking me why muslim women have to cover their head and man don't. from the on i started my gathering fact and opinion from all over the sources i can find , just in case next time someone else insult me like that :)

so here are some thing i found rather more decorated in words ( the capability that i don;t have, my mom always remind me to take some communication class, she says that's my weaknesses point , thank Allah i am not taking anything that got to do with mouth and words! )

well, a muslim woman who covers her head is making statement about her IDENTITY

anyone who sees her will jknow that she is a muslim

and has a good moral charactter

many muslim women who wear cover are filled with dignity

and self esteem; they are

pleased to be identified as a muslim

woman.

as a chaste, modest, pure woman, she does not want her

sexuality to enter into interaction with men in the smallest degree

well.. that's is my humble opinion..

simple but may include both natural features of a muslim moman.

from scf point of view..

one may say the the UV light from heat of the sun.. may give bad impact to the

structure of hairs

we have to include sfc arguements

like the UV light thing

this is what i gathered from #taqwa on mIRC....to be continued :)

ok, for the first time in this fall semester, i walked to school with noris, my other roomate than zaza. usualy me and zaza, we cycle to school, but since the snow started to fall down, we decided to walk to school because we began our class at the same time same place every day. however, today the physics lecture was canceled ( usually we have our FAQ physics on friday )....

noris just went to an eye exa last wednesday. she is going to wear a new colored contact lens next week, honey colored!!!

hahaha..i've been thinking to wear colored contact lens as soon as my "normal" lense finished..baru jer pakai CL, just anout 3 months now, and here wearing colored lens tu takder ler big deal as in m'sia, since warna biasa mata pun mmg tak sama...and dah jadik trend kot pakai lens for different eyes, different color..hahah..cam pakai stokin sebelah kaler kuning sebelah kaler putih kalau socks ilang :)

alhamdulillah, finall i'm feeling fine although a little bit dizzy still.
today is cold. snow is about 4 inches outside, and walking on snow is like walking on a very fine sand, and there is a squeaky sound when you move your steps. the thing is, when the temp increases and the snow melt and then it froze again, the puddle of melted snow became small ice skating area, if you have the wrong shoes, you'll slip off few times on the road :)

another thing is, when cars passes by and the puddles on melted snow ( puddle of mud actually ), splashes on your coat. ahah, imagine how beautiful you can be... and this is no love story: when the driver will stop and say sweet things to you and buy you new clothes : enough crap!

well, i did manage to hand in all my hw on time, haha, except that i did not mention i skip all the last question by just giving the set up and leave the question like that :)....hope they won't mark those

tu la suspennyer, hantar all hw and dia akan pilih 2 or 3 hw jerk...so, kene try sumer yg terbaik...camtuh la...

skang dah sihat and server pun tak buat hal. zaza tgh pilih klas utk spring sem sbb dia ader appointment ngan advisor esok, mine next week..

uwaaaa..i feel like crying even more, i did not do very well in my aem quiz today, hmmmm

i guess life has its own ups and downs. my physics exam last week turn out to be great, something i did not expected be'cos there is one question that i thought i screwed up and it turn out that i scored that one full mark!

anyway, congrats to anas for being the best student, and to sera, is it really hard to get hooked up? and last but not least whoever read this journal and knew what is dr shafinaz journal online web add, pls write it out to me

my fever is still here, and i believe that it's going to be here for a while...takper..sakit pengurang dosa kan?..
regret gak la gi fairmont last weekend, tapi peluang tu just datang skali jer, tak sure mana lagik penting, full mark dlm quiz aem ker carik pengalaman di negara org :)

finally, baru buleh access my blog. i wonder is it my Univ server or was it the blogger.com server..

anyhow, i am not feeling very well today, i got feverish! and i hate my non stop runnning nose...isk..isk..isk..these are the times i feel that not coming here is a very good idea...

tomorrow is my aem exam, 2 homeworks are due on thu , phewwww!..what a week!

wish me luck despite my cold!

here i am in a high school in faimont, minnesota-iowa border. it's really not like high school that you see on TV or in movies. the school os big and has two wings. they eat in the cafeteria during lunch and their cafeteria looks exactly like borading school dining halls ( talking about past experriences!)

their class is such that they were in different class every period. they have 7 periods a day from 8 untill 2.30 tih lunch break around 11-12. i spoke in two class already now and i have one more to go. the students are polite and surprisingly they don't asked that much questions. but i think they are really nice kids here. i provoked them to speak and give opinions and try to get them to talking, and i did make to that. i feel not much differences because they are about my age ( 17-18).

well, today is my second day here and i really like this place

i forgot to bring extra tudung from home, and my host got this big scarf from belarus russia and gave two for me to keep!...and i had a massaage from this lovely lady who happen to be livign closeby..wo, what a wonderful weekend i had

i share this hoest with a girl from spain and another gal from germany. i had the time to litsen to nativer germany spekaing the language as the lady eho gave the massaage just nwo was from germany too
okies
till then

hahha..

who says host housing doesn't have computers? well, here i am on firast day in fairmont, in my host house, having a wonderful time ( except that i can't speak any malay here! )

hmm..we are going for chinese restaurant tonite, so i think it's going to be a great weekend,

we had alittle discusiion thi afternoon regarding islam and other religion adn plaestene and such wow alot more to write but got ot go

haha...

you guys won't get any update about myllife this weekend untill monday nite, i'll be leaving for fairmont ( pn border of iowa and minnesota ) for school international program where i will be send to a host familiy, give presentation in 4 - 5 schools introducing mesia to them..

i like the job, it's free traveling, free accomocation, and just do some little work on promoting my country...it's easy life!

last night my apartment fire alarm went off.....it was a schocking experience for me as i never went of any kind of emergency before..

it was 1.30 in the morning, i was sleeping after i had enough of physics ( i got an exam today morning )..and suddenly the smoke detector went off..and more scarier, the alarm that went off was exactly situated in front of our door!..

and me, noris and zaza decided to go out and check what other people were doing...most of them are out and ready with their jacket to go out of the building

then three fire engine plus a police car came, they have to block the entrace to the I -($ highway ( my house is ecatly next to the main highway)....seram giler when we all saw the firemen masuk with azxes and ladder into the building, they all suspected the boiler rooom in the laundry room was on fire, but the problem was the caretaker, the only person who has the key to the room was not there...

and for about 45 minutes we all were freezing outside waiting for permission to get in in our pijamas...
then the firemen chief ( i think) came and told us what actually triggered the smoke detector, it was the overburned fuse on the corridor nyer lampu...huh!

lega!..however, i was sleepy this morning when i was doing my physics due to the lack of sleep..what anexperience, cam 911 pulak, ishh..pengalaman betul!

still no final decision of who is becoming the US president. we are all waiting for the recount vote for florida which had made 5 major newspapers have to reprint their morning edition and most national TV to cancel their interview with bush and have to make up their mistake for annoucung the election result...

i got my physic group quiz this morning. we have 3 people in a group solving for one hard problem which will contribute about 25 points from our total indinidual quiz marks...in one semester, depending on teh class, physics courses have at least 3 quizes, ( mine got 4 this semester ) and 1 two hour final exam, and 2 course evaluation at the beginning and at the end of our courses...i'm currently taking my second physics course, and no , physics is not my major!

tomorrow i got the individual quiz and we are having islamic cultural bazaar tomorrow. our MSA ( muslim student association ) most varsities in the states have one on each campus...is having malaysian cultual exhibition over in moos tower...we are having some videos, baju kurang, baju melayu and pictures from m'sia,,,

mesian population here is baout 50 people, mostly are fammilies working here, and after my senior leaving next year, all left is 25 ( i think ) of us, 4 gals and 21 boys...urrgrgrggrrggrgrgrgrg...i hate that!

heheh.some notes:

the word abercrombitch = abercrombie + fitch ( i like the brand, their outfitters are comfotable, but it is really irritating to see so many people wearing the same brand, it's like it's cheap when it's not! )...

i got one corduroy i bought from their outlet in the biggest mall in the US...ten bucks, the normal price : 53.60 huh...

:) ...:)

haha

yesterday was the election day and snow day, ( ekk...this does not mean no school! )....well, last night the tempt drop below 0, so, all the melted snow became frost this morning...and it's hard to walk if you are not wearing the right shoes....

10 thing i hate about winter

1. it makes ur nose running
2.it makes ur ears "fragile"
3.it makes my eyes watery
4.you have to wear many gears before going out
5.my cheek burned
6.my skin became dry ( like gator! )
7.you will hate waking up in the cold morning leaving the wam bed to go the shower
8.everybody walk fast
9.ur fingers becoem numb if you don't have glove
10.it's damn cold!!!

hmm...little review on yesterday's election:
bush and gore are very close to one another depending on electoral vote yesterday, however, at time of press release, two more state has not finished counting their electoral vote, thus leaving us today with the decision who is goint to be the president..

check news for better update

as soon as i left the computer lab after i updated the last entry, it was snowing lightly outside...and now it is snowing constantly and heavily. snow started to accumulate on the ground and on the grass..the little squirel all around campus is starting to pack up for the coming winter and running here and there to colect their last meal

girls' cheeks are getting red and smoke started to came out from everyone's breath...most people would be seen in their columbia winter jacket and jansport backpack, the two most famous brand for coats and backpack....their abercrombie and fitch shirt and pants are no more seen...( the famous brand here in this U ) during "normal" temp anywhere between 2 - 40 c.....and the carlson ( school of bussiness ) students are suspected to be the most loyal customersof the abercrombitch :P....remember the lfo song girl of summer?

well, tak sangka , i've been here for my second winter, setahun sekejap sgt, hmm..and i got 3 more yeras to go before i graduated from this u...

heheh...welcome to minnesota ( II )

aha..finally sera mula menulis semula setelah pulang ke kg, hmm...this morning is cold, cold sgt, more over is has not stop raining since yesterday, so add up to the wind chill factor and the temp it self...

and now i began to wonder why in the first place i chose to come here, the ice box of US, huh ,
no use crying over spilt milk!

more troubles, i am a natural born choleric ( tyes of personality from florence litteur's book titled personality plus )...and made a new enemy today...OT as we called him, emailed me as his respond to my comment on atu2000 egroups, wow, that's a full critical critic..cam salah jer nie..

anyway, i wonder when i can start changing from being a natural choleric to a better choleric

let me tell ihr ( you guys in german) briefly about this book: kak har ( Dr Harlina ) she is now a current dr working in HUKM came here last summer and stayed here for few days, we talked a lot and she suggested that i read this book cos she said " it would have been better for me if i read this book when i was ur age"..and so i did..

according to the writer, there are 4 types of personality in this world. sanguine, the life of the party, choleric, natural born leader, phlegmatic, the follower and melancholic, the detailer...more or less, each and every personality type has it's own strength and weaknesses..

and i have mine and you have urs..

erkk..the last two lines is derived from the fact that zaza wanna see what i can do with my blog..hehe... i'm promoting it, rite!...
atu2 students now are fighting with atu1 regarding salam thing and palastein thing, derang suka bother about our bussiness, bukak la egroups sendiri, nak join atu2 yg 96 people ni plak, ntah2 aper..tak matured langsung.. for some stupid reasons, i hate when they do that..always..

i dunno, but funny how people who label themselves pious can be so annoying when it comes to da' wah..gilernyer sakitkan hati

skang tgh layan shazlan, just now gayut ngan azlina, my best bud kat purdue U, amik IT ngan wildlife minor, she loves animals and nature ...
shazlan as crazy as he is, but as nice as he treats me, is my best bud too...erkk..no bf, dianyer gf kat mesia, my junior....so tader canla...eventhough he knows that i like him like crazy, tapi we remain best bud, too close, like twins..dia jauh sgt..florida nun sana...amik pun course yg pelik, technical engineering, aircraft maintanence technology..so we remains friends, since dia ader commitement and ed pulak tak nak couple..so the stories goes..

now my heart, almost fell for my ex classmate..haha..tapi tu pun satu lagik yg tak fall for couple things, amazing!

erkk..my secret identity..erkk..anyone reading this, know the fact..now you understand why i hang out with atu2 basketball team most of the time, although i'm not into sports :)

zaza says hi to the world!

zaza says hi! to the world!

today i called fatiha after more than a year we haven't speak to one another,
an hour and a half!.
gosh, we missed one another badly, heheh, i miss half prt of her life after i left KI..can never imagine, what she had gone through, she had gone through so many things. after she went to USA representimg m'sia for INTEL invention competition, she ahve to do her best ( writing essays..blah blah..)
for competing as tokoh puteri islam ..and yes, she got that title. tokoh puteri islam kebangsaaan, man!.
i was so proud of her achievement without knowing that she suffered befroe spm. she told the whole thing over our conversation juts now and she is still shaking whenever, she tell anyone about her nightmare being perfect in everybody's eye..heheh..susah rupanya jadik idola org nie, tak sangka plak dia yg di pandang perfect
tu memandang ed yg ntah aper2 ni as idola dia, ekekek i kept repeating to her on how i am not the rite person, but she made believe i'm worth something, THANKS A LOT SIS TIHA!..

ntah rasa funny since dah berabad tak bercerita, suddenly we can talk for an hour non stop, huh, how i miss her, she is still my idol and i'm stil her idol, weird huh? saper tak admire, tokoh puteri islam pastu berjubah and bertudung labuh since akil baligh, wakil mesia reakcipta sains ke US , perghhh,
i'm way far behind!..who am i?..erkk ..not again!

i am who i am, i am the Ed , Nadhra Halig, and not so sure what is after that..help please :P

hari ni nak cakap melayu jerk..jeles ngan org2 yg bukeh tulis melayu fully....arghhhh..since duk sini, tak penah cakap melayu fully, tgk, dlm journal ni pun ader BI kang masuk german lak, viel skang amik german sebagai 4th language, bagus tak?..

anyway, rayau la webpage yg linked ngan page sera, perghh....sumer2 page tuh power2. content sumer cool abis, ishh, ras sedih pulak tak reti buat hp ni, cam nak mewajibkan diri belajo buat hp jer lepas nie,

dahler unic ni bebas amik subjek yg tak related to major..:)..so amik system architecture ngan java ngan aper2 la lagik yg buleh menolong ilangkan rasa inferior terhadap m'kat mesia yg lain heheheh

anyhow, i wonder if there is people reading these, if yes, rajin2kanla respon tu my mailbox ...skali ed cakap nie with myself jerk :) malunyer ( blushing sat )....adra1998@hotmail.com

yesterday i spent one hour talking to awin , he got bored , he rang me up and we end up on the phone for about an hour, isn't ridiculous? when we are actually will be seeing one another for the next 3 years, consecutively, and we can talk that long !..

he is wanted alomost everywhere, pelik how you can be with someone who is special to many eyes and but yours,,...weird huh?

erkk..this morning, i woke at 5.18 whereas subuh is 5.28, so i laiad down and woke up again at 7, having no strength to continue the day, and feel back assleep : result: i have to qada' my morning prayer!..shoot!!..arghhhh..for the thousands times, i'm angry to myself, pls, don;t repeat this mistakes..

whateva!

tonite zaza ccok nasik lemak, hehe, the mesian favourite food for breakfast and all around the clock everyday...

miss all the roti canai stall, nasik lemak stall masa kat m'sia, and now i'm way far from there..:(..nak balik!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tader saper2 lagik like me ker? away from home writing ..on a strange hp by strange people..erkk..hope that if blogger admin readt his they won;t go mad :P...

anyway, all this will be over by 2003, just have to be patient by then..rite?????